Have you ever carefully constructed what you are going to say and then e completely misunderstood?
Are there moments in your life when there seems to be no one who understands?
Are you grateful that God understands but really wish there was a physical manifestation so that you wouldn't feel so lonely?
These are some of the things I have felt from a very young age. I was/am grateful that I have a Heavenly Father as my earthly one abandoned me and my step dad while fantastic did not stay with my mom. So having a Heavenly Father who I could cry to with no fear of judgement or resentment or anger was amazing. Problem was I needed a hug.
Over the years I was blessed to have beautiful people in my life who I loved and cherished. Unfortunately it didn't last. For reasons I never understood my friends would cut me out.
Then I got married and had kids and quite frankly life took a turn for the worst. Nothing I did worked no matter how hard I tried it seemed like failure was destined to plague me.
So I find myself at a turning point. Things are changing. But nothing has changed. In the future there will be great changes to my life but for now i plod on lonely and misunderstood.
I feel grateful that I have God in my life as no matter how difficult each day is He is there to carry me through. I have learnt so much about being lonely and how to combat it, I feel like I could offer a class. But the thing I have learnt the most? Enjoy the company of God and enjoy your own company. If you do that lonely seems to be a way of the past.
